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Posts from by Lach Ryan

Blackframes is the writing of Lach Ryan


What you are not supposed to say about Kids

Lach Ryan

I am going to say something that you are not supposed to say about your baby. That is - she is easy! Hard to believe I know but apparently easy children exist.

I know this will threaten the ideas many have on the whole baby scenario, but I cannot lie. Don’t ask me how she’s sleeping if you don't want to hear I worry she has infant narcolepsy. Don’t ask me about the supposed endless crying when she smiles and laughs at me so easily that I worry Wifey may have dropped her on the head and forgot to inform me. In short, don’t ask me about how hard it is to have kids when the truth is they are worth the effort.

I am not saying we aren’t busy, tired and occasionally stressed. Having a young family will give you the blood pressure of a Fortune 500 CEO with an office above a Krispy Creme shop. Simply getting two kids into the car can produce a vein in my forehead visible from space. Venturing into a shopping centre with accompanying minors requires skills that the best SAS soldiers do not posses.

I am also not saying that individual kids cannot be an incredible drain, almost too much for two parents never mind just a single one. I am simply going into the ring against this notion that all babies, as beings, are difficult. When you consider there is currently over 6 billion of us humans on the planet, we must collectively or inherently have some idea of how to handle the freshies?

I am also not writing this from the position of one of those Dads who changes the occasional nappy or has a token hold before bedtime, but is otherwise working at the office, working on his swing or work on a bar tab. I am strapped into the Baby Bjorn, doing the baths, playing, talking and walking and settling whenever I can. I would probably consider wearing a Mr Milker (Google it) if Wifey cut-off the booby smoothies.

I have been lucky to have a few days off from work, just a short break spent at home with the kids. Overall it has been busy and occasionally painfully annoying. But those times are outweighed by  the constant stream of awesomeness that only kids generate.

You will never hear me say “have kids now!” to anyone unless they are mid-labour. I really believe you need to have your own time as a couple before having kids and that in the end, God tends to pick when he is going to insert another little character into the story of life.

But as a lady I recently heard interviewed on the radio put it; “Kids are way more hard work than anyone will tell you, but also infinitely way more fun.”

Sometimes hard work comes easy.